What a year this has been. Off the top of my head it doesn't seem like much has happened since I last wrote. We haven't really gone on any trips, nothing really worth writing about? But the more I think about it... I've had some pretty significant life changes the past couple months.
First, and most importantly, I decided to go back to school. Ever since I dropped out of college, which was my third year at Avila, I have ultimately regretted it. People always ask me why I did, but at the time it seemed like my only option. I was terrified and didn't know what I wanted to do with my life. I was pretty far in to my graphic design major knowing I didn't want to do it any more, and I was scared. I panicked and needed a break. Since then I've had two jobs that have been nothing alike and a lot of student loan debt. Both jobs were "ok" for me at the time, but nothing I would want to do as a career. I thought about it a lot and I think coaching dance team at the high school level brought me to my decision to become a high school art teacher. I've obviously always loved art and creating, but never thought I would be one to teach. I'm currently in my second term of my first semester at Park University and I'm excited, anxious, nervous, and all the above. So far it has been great, especially with all the extra time on my hands, which brings me to major life event #2...
This year I was also laid off from my job. I had been working for a lending company for about 2 1/2 years, and I didn't necessarily love what I did, but I enjoyed the structured 8-5, knowing what my pay check would look like, the people I worked with, and being comfortable. I guess we fall in to habits within our lives. I was comfortable, and clearly not ready for change. I wasn't expecting it, but the company went under and I was let go the end of September. Since then I've applied to a few places, had a few interviews, but pretty down and out about my "future" while I'm in school. Its hard to figure out what will be right for me when I don't really know my school schedule or how long it will take me to reach my goals. My old boss set me up with a new job, and thankfully it will work out for now. I start on Monday and I am actually pretty nervous. I will be an assistant to the president of a different lending company. Being the "new person" and starting over is always overwhelming, but I need to remind myself that change is good. It's good to get out of habits and I guess so far that is what this year has shown me.
In about 3 weeks I will be turning 27 years old and every part of me is wishing I could slow down time. It seems like yesterday I was in high school with not a care in the world. (Of course at the time it seems like we have sooo many "problems" at that age... Please!) I remember being younger and thinking 27 was "old".... I think I always thought at this point in my life I would be married and at least thinking about kids, but I am so far from that it's not even funny. But that's okay, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm going to promise myself not to worry about age, and timelines, and things I can not control. I'm going to focus on my life day-to-day and try to be a better friend, girlfriend, daughter, family member, and student. Because that's all I can really do.
*pic: car-selfie at 26, a year of learning about myself.
